(Multiple Psychological Disorders)
I suffered from multiple psychological disorders. It was tough to put a finger on how to treat it, as different doctors had different opinions and solutions. I had symptoms of psychosis, bi polar, split personality disorder, ADHD, depression and even autism. I do feel that the depression came as a result of having all these other problems.
I suffered from the time I was a child and things just got worse as I got older. The first thing I tried was medication. Which didn’t work at all. Since I had a vast array of issues I could not find anything that covered all my problems. There was no one size fits all. Of course there was the option of taking different medications at the same time, but I was warned that this would be too much for the body to handle so I decided against it. I still did try a number of medication options, I thought that even if this can help 30% of my problem it would be better than nothing. However sadly what I found is that the medication made my situation allot worse and quickly realised that this is not the right route to take. I always knew that medications for psychological disorders may help one cope with life, but will never heal you of your issue. And the fact still remains that they can have adverse effects on your condition as well as being very bad for your health in the long run! As much as I was happy that I wouldn’t have to take these nasty pills again I had another hurdle, and this was to find an alternative therapy that could help me.
I tried many things, from acupuncture, to energy healing, meditation, crystal therapy and many many many more…. The list is just endless…I even travelled to America and India as well as seeing top specialists in London to try get help. Absolutely nothing worked! Nothing at all. Life just became so bad. I wanted to die. My problems meant that. Can live life to the fullest so why exist. The love of my family kept me going, but I reached a point where I wanted out. I begged my parents to give me money to go to Switzerland and do euthanasia. (Euthanasia is legal there). I just wanted to die, period! What was the point of living? The quality of my life was zero, every day was a struggle. I knew it was time to go. It was the only way out. The only reason why I didn’t do it was fear. That’s why I wanted euthanasia, I was simply too scared to try a more painful way.
All this time I still had a feeling that there was someone out there who could help me. The world is an incredible place, if you think of all the elements that exist, all the special people the world has been blessed with, and what mankind has achieved this far, there just must be someone. I also had this crazy idea that life would one day be ok. But these feelings were deep down. On the surface I wanted to go period! I felt that even if there is someone I will never find them. I just didn’t think I’d get that lucky. My life had been terrible, full of bad events that one would only describe as being unlucky. I just didn’t think luck was on my side, especially after trying so many things and being unsuccessful I came to what was then a false realisation that I’ll never find that special person.
After struggling for another year and just scraping through my days, my sister told me about a dear friend of hers from Melbourne who suffered badly from panic attacks and went to a Russian woman who does this unique therapy using liquid metal to heal the nervous system in a bid to get help. Apparently this therapy managed to make her panic attacks disappear and completely heal her of hear fears. This is why my sister told me. Her friend was obviously over the moon of how her problems disappeared and told all her friends about it, my sister told me as soon as she heard and I was gob smacked. I didn’t have that many panic attacks, but I knew what they were and knew that they were bad news. I had that many issues myself that I could easily resonate with others. I thought that if this woman can heal panic attacks there is no reason why she can’t help me. Anyways I realised that if she heals the central nervous system, she can heal the brain too. And that’s when I decided, I’m going to Australia!
Isabella told me straight away that I will have to stop my drinking and drug habits. And we got the therapy underway. It took a long time for me to get better, Bella said this was because my problems were extreme and that I had them for a long time. However I knew this was going to do the job. This is because of (a) her track record and (b) the fact that even though I took a while to get fully better I noticed tiny changes through the therapy. For example after 2 weeks my symptoms were still there but all of a sudden my memory was better, and my sense of direction was better. I just knew something was going on in my brain, something I had never experienced before. My memory was always terrible and my sense of direction was almost zero. These changes told me I was well on my way, something was happening, albeit slowly.
A year later I can safely say that I’ve turned around a corner. I look at pictures of myself a year before and I don’t recognise myself. I actually feel like a normal person now. I finally know what it’s like to be normal, to think normal, and just be like everyone else. Words can’t describe how amazing that feels. I’m normal now! How can that be? from where I was, it’s just to good to be true. I spoke to my grandmother after nine months the other day and she started crying when she saw how much I had changed (Skype). I’m speechless, Lost for words, I just can’t believe it. I’m a normal person now! This is insane.